nineteen days

day thirteen

Posted in the fast - 2009 by amysahba on March 15, 2009

“Take thou good heed that ye may all, under the leadership of Him Who is the Source of Divine Guidance, be enabled to direct thy steps aright upon the Bridge, which is sharper than the sword and finer than a hair, so that perchance the things which from the beginning of thy life till the end thou hast performed for the love of God, may not, all at once and unrealized by thyself, be turned to acts not acceptable in the sight of God.”

The Báb

day thirteen - dawndawn_14 March 2009day thirteen: dawn day thirteen - duskdusk_14 March 2009day thirteen: dusk

amy: an early morning walk in a deserted, quiet saturday morning brooklyn.  just after breakfast and prayers. it’s cold, but bright. and the air is cool in my mouth, in my nose, my thorat, lungs. good friends, silliness, cameras. it’s something so good. so unusual. so unique to this time of the year.

manijeh: during these days of fasting, i find its easier to focus on the tasks at hand, and to be more productive so that when the time comes, and you reach the end of the day, i feel a sense of accomplishment.  being able to break the Fast with friends or family, spending time with those that we love, reminds me how lucky I am to know such wonderful souls.

leila:  after a long spell of spectacular weather, seattle is providing us once again with her usual rains.  we had a visit from a pregnant friend this morning, and i was able to give her more of our daughter’s outgrown baby clothes.  i’m glad that they’ll get used more but it’s also creating ambivalent feelings about how quickly she’s growing—she’s obviously trying to talk already.  tonight shaun and i said prayers for two dear friends in opposite parts of the world, and i love feeling this spiritual connection that’s actually almost physical.  also, based on thoughts i’ve had in recent nights, i wonder whether God ever hates us, His “children”, because we’re so crazy and unreasonable in the middle of the night.  for example.

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10 Responses

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  1. amysahba said, on March 15, 2009 at 12:32 am

    manijeh – i adore that dawn photo, the soft light through the glass!

    leila – oh, your dawn picture is just so so so so sweet. you captured fatherhood as i imagined it.

  2. Della L. Marcus said, on March 15, 2009 at 6:21 am

    Stunning photos yesterday, Amy. I also love Manijeh’s top photograph. A feast for the eyes.

  3. Jasveen Ahluwalia said, on March 15, 2009 at 7:32 am

    Lovely pictures and thoughts amy and leila. I wish i could have been up at dawn today (switched the snooze button) and now counting the hours. Happy fasting!

  4. Ronnie said, on March 15, 2009 at 8:40 am

    Wow! Great photos!

    Superb composition Amy….Love the D.O.P. through the curly arm rests!

  5. nineteen days at afnan-murray.com said, on March 15, 2009 at 1:50 pm

    […] Day 13. My turn to be the ‘guest photographer’. Filed under blog.  | var blogTool = “WordPress”; var blogURL = “http://www.afnan-murray.com”; var blogTitle = “afnan-murray.com”; var postURL = “http://www.afnan-murray.com/2009/03/15/nineteen-days/”; var postTitle = “nineteen days”; var commentAuthorFieldName = “author”; var commentAuthorLoggedIn = false; var commentFormID = “commentform”; var commentTextFieldName = “comment”; var commentButtonName = “submit”; […]

  6. Elizabeth said, on March 15, 2009 at 2:06 pm

    Love that shot of the benches. And the jewel tones of the morning window.

  7. nemoDreamer said, on March 16, 2009 at 12:00 pm

    anothe sweet set of pictures…

    amy: totally..
    manijeh: i know what you mean with a clearer sense of “accomplishment” during the fast. days have a real rhythm to them.
    leila: love your thoughts on the physicality of prayer, and humans as annoying babies… isn’t that how far it ever goes? annoyance, not hate? i hope so, in both sides of the example…

  8. leila said, on March 16, 2009 at 1:26 pm

    nemoDreamer: if i’m honest, i have to say there were a couple of nights last week where i think i actually hated her. i mean i turned my back on her and wanted to ignore her forever. “annoyance” does not represent at all the feelings of my abhorrence for her existence in my life at those times.

    it’s not just the fact that she’s turned our life on its head and we’re rearranging EVERYTHING for her, nor the fact that we both have had a ghastly lack of sleep for two months, or the fact that we spend hours—consecutive HOURS—of rocking, bouncing, shushing, singing, swinging, walking, and patting her to sleep, or the fact that we have to repeat endless varying constellations of these sleep-inducing methods, or even the fact that her endless crying is sometimes at the volume of a chainsaw next to our ears and is at the precise pitch calibrated to raise our blood pressure and induce a panic-response in our bodies, but it’s all of these things combined that has the ability to hack away at my affection for her and make me detest her, if only for an hour or three.

    it’s not my favourite reaction, and it’s difficult to realise that i am one of only two people on this planet who’s meant to have unconditional love for her, but there it is. people tell me it gets better.

    also, it bears repeating that i’m not a patient person and often feel as though i’m not cut out for parenthood.

  9. nemoDreamer said, on March 16, 2009 at 5:48 pm

    leila, you are brutal in your honesty, and refreshing at the same time. probably a lot of parents have felt this way at the beginning, and were just too scared of telling their friends about it…
    all i can offer is that ACTUAL hate would have felt different, or is that just me clinging to my illusions of parenthood?

  10. leili said, on March 18, 2009 at 11:46 pm

    This is one of my favorite sets of all. i love the benches. And the whimsical, gumball-marauding panda!

    manijeh, the warbly dappled stained glass is really lovely and atmospheric. And the lanterns … is it the 50D? I am so excited that you did this. Also, about being with friends – i find that it is often the most social and unifying time of the year. and then, when Naw Ruz arrives, it truly feels like a celebration. Wish you were here for Naw Ruz …

    Leila – love the daddy/baby shot so much. isn’t it amazing how small we people are when we are starting out?


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